It's Not About [So]Me

Lately, there's been a particular topic on my mind; one that, as a practicing Christian and specifically as a Catholic, is very close to my heart: the church season of Lent.

For those of you who might be unfamiliar or a little rusty, Lent is the season immediately preceding Easter, when Christians celebrate the resurrection of Jesus. Lent starts on Ash Wednesday (the day after Mardi Gras for you Louisiana natives), and spans 40 days. The Catholic church especially intends Lent to be a time of solemn reflection, leading up to a holiday full of rejoicing. Christians are familiar with stories from the Gospels, describing Jesus' temptation in the desert, and how he stayed strong in the midst of the world's temptations through prayer and fasting. Keeping in mind the constant goal of being followers of Christ (that is what "Christian" means, after all!), the church (again, the Catholic church especially) encourages all its members to spend the season of Lent like Jesus did--engaging in prayer, penance, and fasting; working on our spiritual discipline; and constantly strengthening our faith through any and all means.

So as you can imagine, there's a spirit of sacrifice and self-denial surrounding the season of Lent. Lent, for Christians, is all about remembering that life is hard, but in the end, the reward is incomparable. Lent is all about denying the self, and focusing more on "things above" than things here below.

I bet at this point you've figured out where this is leading--I'm going to share with you what I decided to give up for Lent. Some of you who read this blog may already know, but here it is: I decided, for the 40 days of Lent, I will not take part in my usual/daily social media outlets (specifically Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, and Tumblr).
**Note: Yes, I realize the irony of sharing these reflections via blogging, a medium that many consider to be social media, but please humor the method to my madness :)**

Those of you who read this blog regularly, most of whom know me pretty well, will know that this is quite a sacrifice (which, of course, is the point--giving up something for Lent is not supposed to be easy). I use Facebook to keep in touch with my high school, college, and grad school friends who live across the country from me. I use Twitter for multitudinous reasons, chief among them a) engaging in professional development with other student affairs professionals across the country, b) live-Tweeting movies, and c) talking about Beyonce. I use Tumblr to keep on top of my pop culture consumption; without it I would not have known so early that Disney is putting a Boy Meets World sequel sitcom, featuring much of the original cast, into production (if you didn't already know this, REJOICE WITH ME). And I use Instagram... well, I'm not really sure how I use Instagram yet. There's not really a streamlined purpose for it for me. I do enjoy looking at pictures of my friends' meals, though, so that's something.

TL; DR: I am almost CONSTANTLY engaging on social media. I have apps on my phone; as soon as I wake up in the morning I'm checking Instagram photos and seeing funny tweets that popped up the night before. When I have a moment at work, I'm scanning Tumblr for the latest updates or taking a few moments out of my day to tweet encouraging messages to friends and students. I check Facebook daily to make sure that I haven't missed any friends' birthdays and to post funny Buzzfeed articles on buddies' walls. From the moment I open my eyes in the morning to the moment I close them at night, I am plugged in and connected to my many networks.

So I did some reflecting right before Ash Wednesday this year, about what to give up for Lent. And I realized something very important: while the amazing networks are, after all, the POINT of social media, all of my social media outlets are doing something for me that I did not intend: they are distracting me. I am constantly drawn to pull up Facebook (assuming, in a very silly way, that I will have some notification that wasn't there 30 seconds ago); I am constantly drawn to send a new tweet or to see what new celebrity-based topic might be trending. Instead of focusing on the task at hand, I allow myself through social media to be distracted. And it's not only at work (although work is primarily where distraction is a BIG problem)--in the mornings, when I wake up, my time could be better spent getting ready for the day, rather than spending 15 minutes checking all my social media apps. Instead of reading Twitter as I eat breakfast, I could be spending some quiet time reading my Bible and doing a devotional, mentally fortifying myself for the day ahead. Instead of spending hours perusing Tumblr after I get home from work, I could be reading a book or cozying up on my couch to watch a movie. Instead of trying to capture the perfect moment to share with friends on Instagram, I could be experiencing the moment.

Lent, ultimately, is about removing the distractions of this world and the temptation to gratify the self. To use church phraseology, it's about "dying to the self" (denying the temptation of constant self-centeredness and selfishness) and being reborn in the faith, with daily motivation found from and intended focus on "things above": God, and what He is doing daily in this world and in my life. So this Lent, that's what I want to do--focus more on things above, rather than things here below.

And hopefully, this focus on higher things--on what God is doing daily in my life, about how I can serve Him better--will lead to a better life here on earth, one that is less centered on me and more centered on others. Serving and loving others is one of the highest pursuits in this life, and I want to give my all to that end.

So, adios, Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Tumblr. We'll talk again in about 40 days... or maybe not. This no-distractions thing is pretty awesome, once you get used to it. 

Looking Back at 2012

Happy New Year, everyone!

It's 2013, a brand new year, and a chance to reflect on the past 365 days. As I get older, it feels like the years go by faster and faster. It seems like just yesterday that I was celebrating the advent of 2012 with some of my very best friends in my hometown of San Angelo, drinking champagne and speculating on the year to come. Here I am now in my new home city, Bloomington, in my new apartment, gazing out my windows at the snow-covered ground (yes, that's right, I live in a place where it SNOWS).

2012 was filled with change, as I expected it would be. I began my job search in January, determined to find a perfect fit for me. In April, I graduated from The Florida State University with my master's degree. In May, my parents announced that my Dad had gotten a new job in North Carolina, and they would be leaving my hometown for good. In July, I was lucky enough to find my perfect fit at Indiana University, and was offered a job. I packed up my life in Tallahassee, and drove cross-country to settle in my new home. Fall of 2012 has been spent adjusting--settling into my new place; learning the ropes at IU; getting to know my new friends, colleagues, and students. Friends and family members have gotten married and had kids; I've lost a beloved grandparent. Life has ebbed and flowed; the days have moved on.

All the while, I lived with my chosen #oneword of 2012: believe. I KNEW this time a year ago that 2012 would be one of the most challenging and life-altering years of my life so far, and so I chose a word that resonated with me to my very core. I had to daily choose to believe that everything that happens, good or bad, is for a reason, and that God's plan for my life would be fulfilled in the perfect time.

One of my StrengthsQuest strengths reflects this very word: Connectedness. According to Gallup, Connectedness means that I believe that "things happen for a reason," and that my "faith sustains me...in the face of life's mysteries." Gallup, again you've described me to a "t," and it's that belief that all things are connected that helped me make it through this year. Through life's ups and downs, I believed that I was doing my best and that everything would turn out alright.

And here I am, reflecting on this past year. I survived 2012; I could probably say that I thrived in 2012. I know I've grown and learned in the past 365 days; I hope that the people in my life can see that growth and change (and that it's for the better!). I have come into a new year a little older, a little wiser (I think), and, hopefully, a little more prepared to take on life's daily challenges.

So here's to you, 2012. You certainly didn't disappoint.

Happy new year to all of you, dear friends! I hope you survived and thrived in 2012, and I hope your 2013 starts out EXACTLY the way you need it to.

Dutiful Citizenship

My Fellow Americans,

Well, it's the day after Election Day, 2012. In case you're woefully out of the news loop, Governor Romney, the Republican candidate for United States President, has conceded the election, and President Obama, the incumbent Democratic candidate, will be confirmed for a second term in office. 

I'll be honest with you--I've been really uneasy throughout this whole election year. Perhaps it's because I recognized that, because I am a job-working, tax-paying American (at a public institution of higher education, no less), I would need to get out and vote in this election. It was time, this year more than any other, for me to take up the mantle of so many Americans before me, that of the voter--a mantle that many American men and women have fought for in the past 300 years. So the deep, (almost) grown-up parts of me recognized that I had/have a responsibility to pay attention to the candidates, pay attention to the issues; just pay attention.

I'll be honest with you again--I don't think I paid ENOUGH attention. Yes, I informed myself well enough to cast my vote for President of the United States. 

BUT--and here is the crux of my whole post--what about everything else? I think that we, the American people, were VERY well-informed about the importance of exercising our civic duty--and did exercise it--in voting for the next President of the United States. However, I think we (and I unequivocally include myself in this "we") managed, somehow, to forget that "civic duty" encompasses SO MUCH MORE than making a mark on paper for the next President every four years.

So consider this post a challenge--not just to you, the reader, but also to me, the writer, because I need to work on this too--to truly understand what it means to be a responsible and dutiful citizen of these United States.

1. Government consists of more than the President of the United States. 

          I almost didn't vote this year. And a huge majority of why I almost didn't vote was because "President" was just one mark on my ballot, a ballot that also included U.S. Senators and Representatives, State Senators and Representatives, local and state judges, county clerks, county treasurers, city council-members, and the local school board.. I imagine that YOUR ballots looked just the same. So here's my question--when was the last time that I, we, informed ourselves about state and local elections? In our tweeting/Facebooking mania about politics, when was the last time we had an informed opinion about who our next mayor or city council-members should be? How many of us can name not just our U.S. congresspeople, but our state congresspeople as well? I sure can't. And I think that's a travesty, that we can gear ourselves up SO MUCH about who our President is going to be, but we forget that our mayor, our city council-members, our county sheriffs and clerks, our governors and lieutenant governors, are going to have more of a direct impact on our everyday lives than the President EVER will. 

Lest we forget the Tenth Amendment to our U.S. Constitution:

"The powers not delegated to the United States by the Constitution, nor prohibited by it to the States, are reserved to the States respectively, or to the people."

Yes, the national government reserves a lot of powers to itself. But all the other decisions are left to the non-national governments in the U.S. So, let's challenge ourselves to GET INFORMED. Let's learn about what our governors and lieutenant governors, our state congresspeople, our mayors, our city council-members, our county clerks, and our local school boards are doing. Let's have as much (if not more) of an opinion about who gets to run our cities, counties, and states as our country as a whole!

2. "Civic Duty" means more than just voting.

          This is a big one, y'all. And again, this is as much a challenge to me personally as it is to those of you who need/want it. When we take to our social media platforms to encourage our fellow Americans to get out there and VOTE, but then the other 3 years and 364 days of the election cycle we do not involve ourselves in the affairs of our cities, counties, states, and country, that's being as negligent of our civic responsibilities as if we didn't vote at all (and hey, some people choose not to exercise the right to vote AT ALL for various reasons, and I respect that personal choice). But, as I said, "civic duty" means SO much more than voting.

a. It means understanding local and state politics. See my point above--the government is made up of SO much more than just the President of the United States, and in order to be good citizens of our country, states, counties, and cities, we should know, have an opinion, and care about what's happening right in front of us.

b. It means supporting or serving in the military. Now, serving in the military is NOT a civic duty that all of us should take up; I myself will probably never be more than just a common citizen of these United States. HOWEVER, that doesn't mean that I cannot and should not support our active duty troops in whatever ways I can. Whether you agree with it or not, we are still in war-time right now as a country, and we still have members of our armed forces serving domestically and internationally. Let's show them that we appreciate their sacrifices on our behalf, shall we?

c. It means making your voice heard. Voting for public officials is a HUGE way to make your voice heard, and I'm so proud of all of my fellow American citizens who chose to exercise that right. But you know what else is a way to make your voice heard? Write letters to your congresspeople. Go set up an appointment with your local, state, or national public officials and see if you can talk to them for 5 minutes about something that's important to you. Exercise your right to free speech, even in public protest if that's how you want to do it. I know ALL of us have opinions about the way our governments should be run every day of the year, not just on Election Day. Let's exercise our First Amendment rights and make those opinions heard. We can't hold our elected officials accountable to their constituencies unless we, the constituents, let our elected officials know what we want. 

d. It means serving your community. The word "civic" means "of or pertaining to a city" and "of or pertaining to citizenship" (thanks, dictionary.com). So yes, voting is a huge piece of our civic responsibilities--we have a responsibility to make our opinions known as to who should lead our governments, state and local. But citizenship means SO much more than just who runs the government; citizenship means being a part of a community. We have not only rights and privileges; we also have responsibilities as citizens of our cities, counties, states, and United States. And one of the biggest responsibilities we have is to serve our community. Whether you're a Democrat, Republican, Libertarian, Independent, or undecided; whether you're a conservative, moderate, or liberal; whether you're young or old; whether you're a temporary citizen of your town (hey college students!) or have lived there for 30 years, get out there and serve. Serve through a church, serve through a non-profit. Volunteer your time, volunteer your money. Serve soup at a soup kitchen; be a mentor for young men and/or women in your community; clean up a public park. Give your energy to a charity or cause you care about. When a natural disaster strikes, help out. When your fellow U.S. citizens need a helping hand, be there. This is not only a civic responsibility; I think this is a responsibility we have to each other as human beings.

This has been a long post. But, as the random high school student in the movie Mean Girls said, "I have a lot of feelings."

I hope I didn't offend anyone through this post; that hasn't been my intent. If you are already practicing the full responsibilities of being an American citizen, THANK YOU! Thank you for doing it, and for serving as the BEST example for me as I discover the full extent of what it means to be an American. 

I think, really, the ultimate feeling behind this post is.... it's GREAT that we, the American people, live in a country that gives us so many rights and priviliges, and the freedom to exercise them. But, in the words of my favorite mantra (slash Uncle Ben from Spiderman),

With great power comes great responsibility.

Let's be responsible, y'all. 

Life's a Banquet

Well, hi there.

I know that I promised to keep you updated vis-a-vis my life changes on this blog... but that's the problem with social media today. You can update "all your friends" via the quick-and-easy outlets, and neglect the medium that really makes you think. For me, that's been this blog. If you look through past posts, you'll see that I've taken to blogging when I really need to process--most of the time I just need to set my words down "on paper" (so to speak) in order to make sense of the world. It's both a blessing and a curse, I think, that I do my processing via writing; it's a weird, half-internal and half-external way of regarding life.

But I digress; I'll wax philosophical on blogging at a later date--for now, I figured that the promised update was indeed in order. 

Although, knowing the nature of social media, I figure pretty much all of you who read this blog know about my amazing, wonderful, joyous, glorious life news and life change--I am now living in the beautiful city of Bloomington, Indiana, working at Indiana University-Bloomington. I persevered and persevered with my job search, pushing my hardest, trying my best, and agonized and worried every step of the way... and inevitably and ultimately, God blessed me immeasurably with a wonderful job, co-workers, students, and institution. 

And, despite some of the day-to-day challenges (choosing a retirement plan is NOT as easy as it sounds), I am happy.

I'm living on my own, TRULY on my own, for the very first time, and the introverted side of me LOVES coming home to the peace and quiet of my own space. 

I'm getting a grown-up paycheck, which I won't go too much into detail about, but which I'm sure MOST of you understand is one of the single greatest joys of having a job.

I'm making new friends and building relationships with new colleagues, which is intimidating at first, but which I know will prove to be a smart move over the next few years.

I'm exploring my new city, from the local eateries (listen, you don't really know breakfast joy 'til you've eaten at The Village Deli) to the local breweries (one word: Upland) to the local events and festivals. And I'm hoping to expand outward as the weather gets cooler, hiking in some of the nearby state parks. By the way, in case you didn't know, I have REAL FALL to look forward to in a few weeks.

More than anything, I'm enjoying each day's joys, mistakes, and lessons, storing it all up in my head and in my heart--this is the stuff that Job One is built on. I'll take each day one day at a time, and I'll do my best to make each day count (yes, that was a Titanic reference). 

And finally, for anyone who is still on the job search, or who will embark on it soon--you've got a friend and a sympathetic ear in me. Call/email/Facebook/Tweet at me anytime. You WILL get through this, and you WILL find a job. You ARE a competent and intelligent individual, and you CAN do this.

For everyone else, I must thank you for your kind words, thoughts, and prayers--my perseverance through the job search was due in large part to knowing I had a wonderful cheering section behind me. Whatever I can do to return the favor, you just let me know.

Now, it's time to get out there and live. 

As one of my favorite literary/cinematic characters, Auntie Mame says, "Life's a banquet, and most poor suckers are starving to death! Live!"

My banquet--and yours--awaits. Let's make today count.

Just call me Goodyear.

Well, it's summer once again. The days are hot (literally), the nights are hot (literally), the humidity is humid (Florida. I shouldn't expect anything else).

So far, my good ol' summertime has consisted of getting my Master's degree from THE Florida State University (MASTER SANSONE!) and continuing to work part-time with the Student Activities Center here at FSU. I've been saying goodbye to my cohort buddies as they go off to start their new jobs, wishing them the BEST (because I know they'll be amazing!). I've been taking my weekends easy, catching up on some good books and great TV shows. I've also gotten to go back to the great state of Texas to celebrate a cousin's wedding, which was a perfect vacation.

But what my summer has not yet consisted of is getting a job. I promise this post won't be a whiny paean to how sad I am about not being gainfully (a.k.a. full-time) employed, so bear with me! :)

You remember rightly, I've been on this job search since January, steadily and faithfully writing more cover letters than I would have ever imagined, filling out applications, talking on phone interviews, and going to visit prospective schools. More than anything else in this process, I have LOVED meeting people--all of these interviews, whether they work out or not, have given me a great introduction to some of the amazing people who work in my field with me. And I'm reassured that, even when I don't get a "yes" from a school, I'm still building some great connections with my colleagues, doing that whole "networking" thing.

I've also been afforded some awesome introspection time during my job search. As I talk with each of these schools, and discuss with them how I might fit with their students, office, department, and institution, I must know myself as best I can, represent myself genuinely, and be open and ready for ANYTHING. I've been doing a LOT of reflection, and I can tell you that I have a lot better idea now than I did a few months ago about who I am, what I need and want out of a first job, and where I might want to be (literally and figuratively) in the coming year and in the future.

I won't lie to you, the job search is taking its toll on me. Getting a "no" is never easy, as anyone who has ever tried out for, applied for, or attempted to do anything can tell you. Multiple "no"s? Even rougher. But, for my fellow student affairs graduates out there who are still job searching, you're not alone. Don't be discouraged. We're in this together, friends! For ANYONE job searching or applying for different opportunities right now--I feel your pain. This process has good days and bad days; highs and lows; excitement AND disappointment.

Even with the lows, the disappointments, the "nos" I've received, though. I'm still keeping the faith. I'm still believing that everything is going to work out according to the big Master Plan; that I'm going to end up exactly where I need to be. Because, even with the "no"s, all I need is that one "YES."

I'll promise you again that you'll get to read an excited "YAY I GOT A JOB!" post when that moment happens, but until then, know that it's all going to be okay. If I've heard it said once during this past semester, I've heard it said a million times--I've gotta trust the process. And cliche as it might be, I think it's true--this job search is a proving ground for me (like those awesome Goodyear commercials where the cars fly over hills and take really sharp turns between cones in the desert). I've gotta take myself on some test runs, go over some sharp obstacles and check my endurance, to show off what I'm really made of.

Time to kick the tires and light the fires.

On the Verge.

I'm graduating in a week.

*deep breath*

In one week, I will have obtained my Master's degree from The Florida State University.

I'll be honest, I'm having a lot of trouble writing this entry, because I truly don't know how to feel. I'm excited that I will have a break from 20 consecutive years of schooling (I love the learning, but the homework? Not so much). I'm excited to celebrate two years of hard work with my fellow Higher Education grads. I'm excited to see my family for the first time since Christmas, and to introduce them to everyone (it's not like I don't talk about them enough), and to meet my fellow grads' families.

I'm confident that I'll continue my job search and will end up with the right position for me (expect an excited blog post when I officially accept a position!). I'm confident that God is guiding my path and that I will be working where I'm meant to, guiding the lives of students and learning from everyone around me.

I normally try not to get sad at "goodbyes," because I believe much more in the "see you later." I firmly intend to keep a regular correspondence with students, friends, colleagues.
But, what will happen when I go somewhere new, move to a new city? Where will I be without the ability to walk downstairs and commiserate about homework with my roommate? What will I do without the immediate and present guidance and support of my supervisor, colleagues, fellow grads, friends, professors, mentors? What will I do when I can't eat Gordos on the reg? (I'm not really joking with that last one.)

Now is the time that I've quite honestly been terrified of for the past three years or so: the real world. Not that my time in Tallahassee and at Florida State has NOT been the real world; on the contrary, I feel beyond prepared to take on the challenges of being a professional and a full-time grown up. But truly, I won't have school to fall back on. I won't have the excuse, "Oh, I'm a student." For while I will continually learn, that won't be my full-time job anymore. I will be an independent adult. Which is pretty gosh darn terrifying. (And exciting. But mostly terrifying.)

For now, though, I still have a week before I'm officially done. I'm going to take my own advice and focus on being present in the present. I'm going to finish out this next week strong. I'm going to celebrate Aggie Muster Day tomorrow, and reminisce about where I come from and the people who got me here. I'm going to enjoy every minute with my friends, colleagues, and family.

Because I'm graduating in a week.
*cue Vitamin C*

Reflections on the 2012 Dalton Institute

           It's rare to find institutions of higher education that host their own nationally-renowned conferences; it's even more rare that these conferences are specific to higher education itself. I feel very lucky to be getting my master's degree at such an institution, Florida State, that hosts such a conference, the Jon C. Dalton Institute on College Student Values. I feel even more lucky that the conference's main focus is as the name implies—finding ways to encourage college students to be ethical and thoughtful leaders who live by their values. Values permeate our everyday life, but they aren't often talked about explicitly; yet here at FSU we get the chance to speak with higher education professionals from around the world who want to encourage their students to be people of character. Having been involved with the Dalton Institute for two years, first as a volunteer and then as a committee chair, I have definitely learned some valuable takeaways that will benefit me as I move forward into my career as a student affairs professional.

            First, I have learned that helping to plan and facilitate a conference is an invaluable experience, and it's something I'd like to continue as a professional. This year I served as the Technology and Concurrent Sessions Committee Chair. As such, I managed the Institute's social media presence before, during, and after the conference; and I coordinated shifts of volunteers to serve as concurrent session attendants during the Institute itself (not only to facilitate each presenter's technology needs, but also to give our volunteers a chance to sit in on individual sessions!). Being a part of the Dalton Institute was a wonderful experience. Helping people is one of my passions in life, as corny as that may sound, and being able to welcome each session presenter, help take care of their needs, and show them how grateful we were for their presence at the Institute made my three days with Dalton very positive. Although I wasn't able to sit in on any concurrent sessions myself, I was glad to afford that opportunity to the volunteers on my committee, and I am able to look back proudly at the three days of the Institute and say that my committee worked hard, and they helped the conference go off with only a very few, very minor hitches. Even more, it was amazing to live-tweet many of the Dalton Institute's sessions on Twitter, and to be able to watch professionals around the country who couldn't be at FSU learn and interact alongside the conference's participants. I hope to have many more experiences in planning and facilitating conferences in the future; bringing together higher education professionals to learn and grow together is too good an opportunity to pass up.

            A second thing I learned during my time with the Dalton Institute is that encouraging our students in pursuing their goals is one of the most important things that higher education professionals can and should do. The theme of this year's Dalton Institute was social entrepreneurship, and we were lucky enough to have as two of our keynotes Eboo Patel, one of the founders of the Interfaith Youth Core, and Jessica Jackley, one of the founders of Kiva. Listening to their stories was inspiring; what was even more inspiring was to hear them speak on the encouragement they received from their mentors, the valuable lessons they learned during their time in college, and their message to the professionals attending Dalton to keep on doing what we're doing. It was amazing to hear these two leaders speak so positively of their higher education experiences, and only cemented for me my personal mission of supporting every student that comes my way. Even if the students I advise don't turn out to be the next Eboo or Jessica, they have personal visions and purposes of their own, and it should be my job now and forever to help them realize the potential within themselves and to pursue their dreams.

            Finally, working with the Dalton Institute has reinforced for me the idea that common values and goals among higher education professionals are the strongest uniting force we can have. The Dalton Institute brings together not only student affairs professionals, but also Deans, Vice Presidents, Professors, and many other professionals from many disciplines across the higher education setting and beyond (such as our participants from the Interfaith Youth Core). Even though all participants had varied backgrounds, they came together to discuss a goal common to them—encouraging the students with whom they work to be people of integrity and character. In my future as a student affairs professional, I hope to find common, student-centered goals and visions with the other professionals at my institution, be they administrative, faculty, or staff; and I hope that these common goals can help bring us together to make our institution stronger and our programs and plans more effective in helping our students learn and grow.

            Cooperation is an integral part of our work as student affairs professionals—working with our students to help them grow; working with organizations and programs to make them purposeful; working with fellow faculty and staff at our institutions to realize and emulate our universities' missions and values. I think the Dalton Institute is one of the best examples of cooperation in higher education—professionals working together with common goals and purposes, in order to make a difference. I'm very thankful for my time with the Institute, and I can't wait to take the valuable lessons I've learned and apply them to my future work and my future relationships with students and colleagues.