Well, I totally intended for this blog to keep up better with my adventures. But you know what they say… the best laid plans of mice and men gang aft agley. (What does that even mean?)
So far this summer has involved a LOT more growing up than I expected. It started with graduation from college, which was SO hard in and of itself. As the school year wound down, I started to realize that many of the people I see every day would slowly fade out of my life. The people that I call some of my best friends are people that I probably won’t see but once or twice within the next few years. Dealing with THAT was hard enough, in addition to moving out of my beautiful apartment #78. So many good times were had there, and it was hard to leave knowing that, even though we’re paying rent for the summer (darn the lack of subleasers!), #78 isn’t “my apartment”—or my home—any more.
Next phase of growing up? Moving home. You know, when you think about moving in with your parents, you think you’ll get to regress to this blissful state of childhood where mommy cooks you every meal and daddy lets you stay up late and watch TV with him. You have to do chores occasionally, but your parents are so happy to have you home that they give you a little reprieve! Well, hate to break it to you, but returning home requires more maturity than moving on your own does (and I’m sure many of you can attest to this). On the one hand, your parents expect you to continue taking care of yourself and providing for yourself (i.e. I cook most of my meals, do my laundry, clean my own room, and have a part-time job) as you have while you’ve been living on your own. On the other hand, they also expect you to adjust to living with them as adults—to respect the rules of THEIR house and to not impose yourself too much on the routine they’ve established (and been very happy with) while you were at college for four years. Don’t get me wrong, my parents are glad to have me home for the summer, especially because they realize (and hope desperately) that I will never be living with them again, so it’s definitely a sort of gift. But there’s something truly hard about having to re-adjust to living at home after four years on your own, AND to make it pleasant for all parties involved.
I DEFINITELY get lonesome for college. It’s hard to see everyone’s Facebook chatter about how awesome Northgate is, and how awesome it is to be in a college town for the summer, and how AWESOME all their involvement is, etc. It’s especially hard to live so far away from school and to not be able to go visit but once this entire summer. I have had some respite from the lonely—I’ve had a great time reconnecting with my best friends from high school. I had the opportunity to go to Austin a few weekends ago to see two of my best friends in the whole world. And at the end of July/beginning of August, I have TWO weddings and a trip to c-stat to look forward to! But in the meantime, I have the same routine EVERY DAY—another facet of the whole growing up thing.
A HUGE part of the maturing process for me this summer has been working out. Senior year at school, I did absolutely nada to stay in shape. I turned 21 and so my body faced all the rigors that come with an active nightlife, and I rarely, if ever, visited the Rec Center to work off anything I was eating or drinking. Needless to say, I graduated college looking significantly different from when I began it. So the parents and I sat down and, after some resistance on my part, got me a personal trainer and a new diet for the summer. I’ve been thankful this whole time, but it was a difficult adjustment (and still is, some days) because I have NEVER, EVER enjoyed working out. For me, exercise is something that I’m supposed to do but that sucks fun out of my life for 30 minutes to an hour every day. Why go running when I can sit down and read a book, or visit with friends, or go out to eat? Well, I had to realize that, as in every aspect of becoming mature, growing up involves doing a LOT of things that you know suck a lot, but you do them anyway because you’re supposed to. I’ve been working out for almost 5 weeks now, and I’ve lost close to 15 pounds since the beginning of the summer! I’m really proud of myself, and I’m especially excited that I’ve found certain things that I don’t hate. (On this note, if you ever get a chance to do a Zumba class—Latin-inspired cardio dance—I HIGHLY RECOMMEND IT!)
One of the most recent parts of my growing up journey has been my part-time job. I like my bosses, I like the women I work with, I think the boutique where I work is ADORABLE… but working in retail is not something permanent in my life, and while at school I got into this mindset that if it doesn’t benefit the future, it’s a waste of time. I need to shake off this attitude as part of the growing up thing, though, and I’ll tell you why. First of all, there’s significant knowledge to be gained in stopping right where you are in life, sitting down, taking stock of where and who you are, and just ENJOYING THE MOMENT. I have to remind myself of this every day, but since I’m home for the summer and working in this job for at least another month, there’s no reason I shouldn’t try to find at least a little bit of joy in it every day. Second, my job IS helping me for the future… I’m making money! Sure, I’m not banking by any means, but all the money I’ve been spending recently is left over from my graduation cache, so all of my paychecks are going into SAVINGS! My years at grad school are going to be FULL of spending more money—especially because I’ll be coming home for (hopefully) two weddings next summer alone—so every little bit that I’m making now is more than worthwhile.
So within the moments of difficulty I’ve found moments of joy, and I think this summer will definitely be one to remember. Perhaps it won’t be on the level of last summer—roadtrips every weekend, out dancing and having a blast every Thursday night, days by the pool—but it will be full of milestones marking personal growth, and full of time with the people that love me best.
Until next time (which will definitely NOT be three more months from now), love to all :)
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