The soft sounds of Pandora (Katy Perry radio; you're welcome).
The autumn wind gusting outside my windows.
The soft hum of my office heater.
The click-clack of my keyboard keys as I type.
The quiet murmur of the facilities workers performing maintenance.
These are the sounds I hear this morning, in this restful quiet. The students of IU are officially on Thanksgiving Break, and I'm in the office, ready to be productive and really barrel through my to-do list, uninterrupted. But before I start off into my Csziksentmihalyi "flow" time, I wanted to take a moment to be thankful for the quiet. My little introvert heart rarely gets this time to rest, focus, and refocus, and I intend to wring greatness out of every moment of today. It is the week of Thanksgiving, after all, and I'm trying to take time to be thankful in the midst of all circumstances.
Ahhhhhhhhhh. The quiet.
Monday, November 24, 2014
Thursday, November 20, 2014
When words fail
I've begun and then dropped this blog post 3 or 4 times over the past couple of weeks. Each time I begin it anew, I take a look at what I've written, and delete. Call it writer's block, call it busy-ness, call it pickiness, but for some reason I just have not been able to put "pen to page," metaphorically speaking, for the past month or so.
Today, I woke up to the news that there was a shooting in Strozier Library at Florida State University, my graduate school alma mater. Three students were shot (one is in critical condition), and the gunman himself was killed in a shootout with police. We don't know why this happened. We can be thankful for the swift action of FSU and Tallahassee police, and the caring and open hearts and arms and offices of student affairs professionals across campus, who are helping students seek the help they may need today.
It is this senseless news that unlocks the flow of words within me... and yet, I can't really find the words to describe how I feel. Shocked, that the warm family I remember from FSU would be so attacked. Thankful, that so few students were injured, and that the situation was resolved quickly. Worried, for the students who will be affected by this, and for my colleagues and friends at FSU who will be caring for and counseling the students - and each other - through the aftermath. Grateful, and immediately guilty, that I am not there - how would I handle this news if I were still in Tallahassee? How would I help students? How would I handle my own worry, my own grief?
How am I handling it now?
Sometimes, words fail us. This is shocking to me, as an English and communication double major, but it's true. Sometimes, we must feel without being able to express; let the emotions course through us and just live in those feelings, without saying (or doing) anything other than feeling. That's what's been happening to me today. Words have failed; all I can do is feel. All I can do is sit, and be sad, and be not understanding of why things happen the way they do, and be thankful for the outpouring of support for Florida State, and be thankful for my colleagues and students and friends, and just... feel.
Hug someone today. Let someone know you care. Send a message of love and support to someone you haven't spoken to in a while. Let's take the time today to make this world a little more loving, a little brighter. Let's take the time to inhabit our emotions and not repress them through words (as it's sometimes easy to do), but to sit and stew and know what it is to be happy or sad or excited or angry or clueless or overwhelmed.
Take a moment to let the words slide away, and just feel.
Today, I woke up to the news that there was a shooting in Strozier Library at Florida State University, my graduate school alma mater. Three students were shot (one is in critical condition), and the gunman himself was killed in a shootout with police. We don't know why this happened. We can be thankful for the swift action of FSU and Tallahassee police, and the caring and open hearts and arms and offices of student affairs professionals across campus, who are helping students seek the help they may need today.
It is this senseless news that unlocks the flow of words within me... and yet, I can't really find the words to describe how I feel. Shocked, that the warm family I remember from FSU would be so attacked. Thankful, that so few students were injured, and that the situation was resolved quickly. Worried, for the students who will be affected by this, and for my colleagues and friends at FSU who will be caring for and counseling the students - and each other - through the aftermath. Grateful, and immediately guilty, that I am not there - how would I handle this news if I were still in Tallahassee? How would I help students? How would I handle my own worry, my own grief?
How am I handling it now?
Sometimes, words fail us. This is shocking to me, as an English and communication double major, but it's true. Sometimes, we must feel without being able to express; let the emotions course through us and just live in those feelings, without saying (or doing) anything other than feeling. That's what's been happening to me today. Words have failed; all I can do is feel. All I can do is sit, and be sad, and be not understanding of why things happen the way they do, and be thankful for the outpouring of support for Florida State, and be thankful for my colleagues and students and friends, and just... feel.
Hug someone today. Let someone know you care. Send a message of love and support to someone you haven't spoken to in a while. Let's take the time today to make this world a little more loving, a little brighter. Let's take the time to inhabit our emotions and not repress them through words (as it's sometimes easy to do), but to sit and stew and know what it is to be happy or sad or excited or angry or clueless or overwhelmed.
Take a moment to let the words slide away, and just feel.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)